Station To Station

A movie needs a great idea at its core, for starters. You build around that core with layers. The writing wraps around the idea and expands on it. A director internalizes the script and finds a way to present the idea in a way that is intriguing to the actors, who attempt to convey the idea to us, the audience. The cinematography, the music, the pacing: all important to the basic notion of conveying an interesting idea in a film.

Southland Tales, written and directed by Richard Kelly (of Donnie Darko fame), has that interesting idea at its core. It's a nice alternate history story, something that could have been cooked up by Arthur C. Clarke, or Greg Bear if we're feeling particularly difficult. The basic premise follows: Twin nuclear attacks on Texas in 2005 send America to war and the Patriot Act into overdrive. A "big brother" agency called US-IDent is keeping tabs on dissidents, including a group of  Neo-Marxists. Meanwhile, a German group called Treer has developed a new form of energy called "Fluid Karma," which is ripping a hole in space and time. These storylines and the characters involved in them begin to intertwine.

Or congeal, as it were. Because one of the many problems with Southland Tales is that the several hundred (it seems) plot points cloud the central idea of the movie. And when they come together, it’s with a resounding “Thud!” During the big reveal at the end of the film, I had to take a moment to say, “Oh, yeah, that’s what this movie was about!” Too many meandering subplots and too many superfluous characters just seem to hang around, taking up screen time without contributing much to the overall flow of the film..

There’s Justin Timerlake as Pilot Abilene, the narrator of the film. He’s a veteran of the Iraq War, disfigured by “friendly fire.” There’s Dwayne Johnson as Boxer Santaros, or Jericho Kane, or whomever he thinks he is at any given moment. Sean William Scott plays two characters, sort of. How about Sarah Michelle Gellar as an ex-porn star? How about a mini Saturday Night Live reunion? Amy Poehler, Jon Lovitz, Nora Dunn, Cheri Oteri, and Janeane Garofolo all appear. Mandy Moore? Check. Kevin Smith? Check. Miranda Richardson? Check. Wallace Shawn? Inconceivable! Bai Ling? Unfortunately, yes. Even the great Zelda Rubinstein pops in for a few scenes.

Yet half of the cast looks downright befuddled to even be there. Some try hard. I’m convinced that someday Johnson will do something magical on screen. But here he looks like he doesn’t know what to do with the little he’s been given. Christopher Lambert mostly looks around and makes a face. I’m sure that was infinitely more than the screenplay told him to do. The other half of the cast looks like they’re having a laugh. I’m convinced Moore was in on the joke the whole time, whatever the joke was.

Kelly is juggling a lot of balls in the air with Southland Tales. He’s aiming for political satire, with a healthy dose of science fiction. The problem is that the film isn’t particularly funny, just weird and awkward. The political elements aren’t especially biting, either. Did you know our civil liberties are being sabotaged? I read Time magazine, too!

One thing that should be noted: Despite misgivings, Southland Tales is indeed watchable. It is, by turns, fascinating, frustrating, dangerous, hilarious, embarrassing, and remarkable. And it is completely awful. It’s up for debate whether it’s a cult classic in the making or something that the cinematic world will attempt to forget. I claim the former.

Grade: D+